I have very few relatives in Edmonton and I rarely see out-of-town family. But this week has been a holiday for my wife so we packed up the old hatchback and headed down to Cowtown to visit with some blood.
It was a blast. I’m going to make an effort to reconnect with relatives I almost never talk to. It’s amazing how we can let family connections slide. This week, I learned some things about my family that I was shocked about not knowing. It was an overdue visit, for sure. I don’t know how I let these connections slip onto the backburner, especially since these people would love me no matter what.
In fact, things have been generally great lately. I got into law school, my wife got her dream job and is starting a master’s degree by correspondence, my freelance work has been very busy and not a whole lot has been going wrong. I know that a lot of this is due to luck, but, if we don’t focus on the positives in life, we’re lost.
On the other hand, if we focus too much on the positives, then we sound like we’re bragging and we end up alienating the people we were so glad we reconnected with. Of course, my flaws have always been an acid test of sorts when it comes to people that I maintain strong bonds with. I’d rather spend time with people who enjoy what I have to offer. Just be yourself, add in a good measure of forgiveness and you’ll end up surrounded by people who fit well with you.
Over-dwelling on good news can rub some people the wrong way. So let me try to see the grey storm clouds through all this silver lining. Spending so much time with my relatives has shown me how much I was missing over the years. It sucks that I missed out on spending more time with them when I was younger. Also, I’m kind of a jerk for letting that happen. Sure, my work has been busy lately, which has given me just a glimpse of what it might be like to not worry about money. But soon I’m going to stop working and go to school and we’ll have to be super-frugal again. It won’t mean ramen noodles every night, but it will mean going back to a certain cautious mindframe.
I’m going to have to study, take notes in class and write exams. And I won’t be working from home anymore, which means I’ll have to commute every weekday. I’m sure many people know how unpleasant that can be. Plus, my wife will be studying, too, so I’ll rarely see her.
There, see? Just because it’s spring and I’m annoying and chipper doesn’t mean you have to resent me. I have grey clouds above my head just like anyone else.
So let this be a lesson to you, albeit one you’ve rarely been taught: don’t take the bad things in your life for granted. Make sure to take stock of them regularly — they help you keep your humble perspective on life and prevent you from unduly irritating those around you.
Dave Lloyd is a writer and musician who grew up in St. Albert.
